february 25,2005

snow day revisited
i have always loved sweater weather.cold sad days that require lots of layers. today-though-is actually pretty. rather deceiving, in fact,for although it is sunny and blindingly white-it is nippy and cunning and ready to catch you unaware with your unbuttoned guard down.(you could catch your death)the kind of day that knocks you clear off your feet with that so happy to be alive kind of feeling. today has been a day for soul torturing. self help books and daily affirmations-just can't penetrate the restlessness. not so much disgruntled with all that makes up this silly pie in the sky girl-but rather all of the many lengthy lists of do or die that are shoved in my back jeans pocket,asnd the lifelong journey to coolness,accomplishments,or just even the ability to write someting worth reading. and so here i am at noon-pajama clad loser-writing to noone-an audience of me.longing for frosty cocoa memories of mom and snowball fights and scads of crappy neighborhood kids feeding off of the spoils of the day,and her chocolate chip cookies.and eventually i'll get ready and brave the day-button up my cool wool coat-hands in pockets(i can never find any mittens)and plunge face first into the slicingly cold and achingly beautiful sunshine and go on to a day of poems not written-dreams on the backburner and cold february nothingness.stupid groundhog.